insecure much?

what causes people to be so insecure? is it because they have something to hide and fear what they do to others will happen to themselves? or is it some deep rooted issue that has been buried and hidden for years?

welp. i'm pretty much dealing with all of that. i've always have had insecurities. ever since i could remember, somebody's has been breaking my heart, hurting my feelings, etc. weither it be a best friend, a family member, or the current boyfriend - i've always ended up crying.

soooo, i finally get to a point in my life where i'm letting those insecurites go. not worrying about somebody being out to hurt me and not caring what you think about me. then, i actually start to trust people. thats BiG for me. trusting is pretty hard to do. and i finally begin to put all my trust into someone.

today i find out that that same person im putting all my heart, soul, and trust into is feeling insecure about me! Whaaaaa?!??!!!?!?!? why? i've been asking myself that for the past hour.
i just don't get how you feel a certain way about someone to find that they have this little speck of doubt in their brain. especially after all me and this person has been thru. thru hell, snow, drought, and back.

i'm currently at a loss for words on how i feel about the situation. because it sprung up out of nowhere. which brings me to the issue of there being a double standard. how one person can do things but the other can't because of someone else's insecurities. i can't go see my male friends anymore because you think there's something going on. while i'm fine with the fact that you go see your female friends. maybe because i TRUST someone, and understand that friends are just friends.

WTH????
i can't believe it.