dreammoods

so i had this weird ass dream today.

i was going about my day. then i decided to call HiM. he didn't answer. but he called back soon after. i couldn't hear what he was saying. but i was smiling. then i was crying. then i hang up. so i call back. he ignores the call. then i get a text. saying, im coming over later....then i look outside of my window, and im facing a giant body of water. maybe the ocean....and out of nowhere, a redonkulous sized whale, i mean GInormaous whale jumps out the water and then goes back in. [then i wake up]

so i quickly went to dreammoods.com straight to dream dictionary, and i look up the meaning of whales. it meant that a big project or RELATIONSHIP was becoming a bit overwhelming. and that your looking for ways to handle. 

so by the size of that whale must mean. me && his situation is becoming more than just a big problem to me. i love him with all my heart, but honestly where we are now is not a good look. and our "complicated status" is realllly wearing on my heart. to the point of not being able to handle myself. he says.....we love each other, we're going to work it out, we're going to get back together. JUST DONT RUSH. but if things are looking better, why not?????

idk. im so lost and confused. and then to top it off. he said it would happen soon. WTF IS SOON? i swear......idk.

but for some reason the love is too much to leave. 2 years.....i wonder why he hasn't left me yet, and im sitting here wondering why i haven't either.....